We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
