Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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