I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
