all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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