Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Randomize
