I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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