I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
this boner is exhausting
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
