We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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