So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Randomize