Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
