do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
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