I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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