Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Randomize
