handjob tips. give me some.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
