My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
