And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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