if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
People with herpes should wear stickers.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
