If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
No subtext here. People are naked.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
