I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
