He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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