so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
You know, be my cock's hype man.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Randomize
