i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
