i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize