Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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