You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize