What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
