That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Randomize
