remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
