they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Randomize
