dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
