i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
