Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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