We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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