Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Randomize
