I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
