Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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