I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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