we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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