Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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