So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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