if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize