So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
