you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
