when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Can vaginas get frostbite?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Randomize
