I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
