you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I think I want to impress his gay best friend more than him..
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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