It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
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