hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
