i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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