..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
