singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
A bitchslap is in order.
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